Tucker Max; Absurdity Ensues?

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9010My name is Tucker Max, and I am an asshole. I get excessively drunk at inappropriate times, disregard social norms, indulge every whim, ignore the consequences of my actions, mock idiots and posers, sleep with more women than is safe or reasonable, and just generally act like a raging dickhead. But, I do contribute to humanity in one very important way: I share my adventures with the world. —

Actual reader feedback:

“I find it truly appalling that there are people in the world like you. You are a disgusting, vile, repulsive, repugnant, foul creature. Because of you, I don’t believe in God anymore. No just God would allow someone like you to exist.”

“I’ll stay with God as my lord, but you are my savior. I just finished reading your brilliant stories, and I laughed so hard I almost vomited. I want to bring that kind of joy to people. You’re an artist of the highest order and a true humanitarian to boot. I’m in both shock and awe at how much I want to be you.”


Tucker Max is an acclaimed pioneer in fratire writing. His first book, I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, is a personal recount of his drunk and promiscuous 20’s in horrifying detail. This book was something I would not traditionally read, but like so many people, and cats, curiosity got the better of me. Tucker is not your typical author. He writes his adventures without using of the traditional hang-ups of fundamentals, but this only adds to the wonderful simplicity of his writing. An easy and quick read, this book draws its reader in quickly and doesn’t let them look away until last page.

Few people get into the business of entertainment, and even fewer go in with a mind set or goal of making people forget their every day problems by telling a story and/or getting them to laugh. I’d like to hope that Tucker Max is one of the fewer entertainers out there for other people and not out there just for himself. While his subject matter is not for everyone, I do have to say many chapters made me cringe and laugh others just made me cringe. Would I recommend this book? Not unless I knew you, and knew could take very dry sarcastic jokes.




Chapter: The Famous Sushi Pants Story 

Thoughts: First, this story can’t be that famous because I haven’t heard it. Second, this story should be called Sushi for Pants, as he did have to take off his pants to get sushi. All lame jokes aside, this guy is lying! There is no way someone would be that drunk and irresponsible without getting arrested. Losing your pants, wallet, and phone, but not your breathalyzer or car keys? Where were his friends?


Chapter: The Night We Almost Died

Thoughts: Oh my God! I would have been crying at this point! Maybe the Sushi Pants Story isn’t so far fetched? I can’t believe that actually happened. I can’t believe he found a group of friends who get just as obnoxious, loud and irresponsible when they drink.  The drive back home with everyone in the car is freaking hilarious!

Best Line of the Night:  Thomas “Those are totally the same truck lights. They’ve been behind us since Durham. Tucker, seriously, start evasive maneuvers or something.”


Chapter: Tucker F*cks a Fat Girl; Hilarity Ensues

Thoughts: Tucker Max is an awful and ridiculously horrible human being! What’s worse is the girl knew what she was getting into; she reads his blog! What is wrong with people?! Then, Tucker throws her clothes out his bedroom window so his roommates don’t see her? Really! Don’t get me wrong; the roommates would have mocked and humiliated this girl to her face and it would have been horrible, but who does this to another human being in the first place? Then you justify it by saying you were only 23 at the time – as if your age ever excuses that type of behavior past the age of 16!?


Chapter: Quite the Vacation

Thougths: GROSS!!! (laughing uncontrollably, What is wrong with me?) This girl had medical issues after her sleeping with Tucker. (And no, these issues did not have anything to do with STD’s.)


Chapter: Tucker Goes to Vegas (Specifically Cincinnati Girl)

 Thoughts: Oh my God! I’m guessing he didn’t use protection and that in itself is stupid and dangerous. Also, I feel so bad for the person who has to clean that up! That is so disgusting! (I think I just threw up in my mouth a little.) Another thing, I cannot believe there are girls out there stupid enough to believe in a Christian rap band called “The Last Suppa’?” Can someone please explain this to me?


Chapters: Floss & Girl Beats Tucker at His Own Game

 Thoughts: I’m just now starting to get a glimpse of extreme lack of morality that drives Tucker Max. I knew his moral compass didn’t point exactly straight, I just didn’t think he would have no compass at all! I mean AT ALL! This story made my stomach physically hurt! He revels in finding girls who suffer from extreme lack of self esteem and uses it for his amusement. (Why am I still reading this book?)


Chapters: This’ll Just Hurt a Little & Tucker Has a Moment of Reflection; Ends Poorly

 Thoughts: YES! FINALLY! Someone gets even with Tucker! (Thank you “Stephanie.”) No Tucker, you aren’t as smooth as you think and yes, there are girls out there that play the same games you do and for the same exact reasons! THANK GOD you have some smart female friends to set you straight!


Chapter: The Absinthe Donuts Story

 Thoughts: (Uncontrollable belly laughter!) I cannot believe he got away with this! YOU wipe all your fingerprints and run 40 blocks away from the scene. You got so lucky!


Chapter: The Worst Tucker Max Story Ever

 Thoughts: This is the worst Tucker Max story ever. I want to slit my wrists. This story is bad on so many different levels. It actually depressed me.

Questions you are probably asking yourself after reading my reactions:

Why did you read this book?

Being a librarian, you see countless people and books daily. Lately I had seen this book pass by more than once and had always been curious about its content. So what does any good book blogger do? I put a copy on hold and read it non-stop for three days.

Why did you keep reading this book?

Each chapter I read was like being able to take part in the retelling of crazy drunken stories. If you can’t empathize with that, then you obviously never had a crazy night yourself. Even so, the stories I read ranged from the most obscure craziness to downright hilarious mistakes to the most horrendous examples of humanity and all of it was an experience I cannot regret reading. It’s been said before about Tucker Max, but I want to say it again. He has the courage most of us lack to look at himself honestly and put it on a page. He doesn’t sugarcoat it and give excuses or try and reason everything away; he presents his life as openly as possible and doesn’t worry about what anyone will think. I have a tremendous amount of respect for his writing. If we can take anything away from his books, at very least we can all learn from his behavior.

Questions I’m asking myself after reading this book:

Are girls really that dumb?

I would first like to respond with a “No,” but honestly I’m hoping it’s at least 60/40 and in reality it’s maybe 50/50. I’m sure Tucker could comment on the ratio. However, I swear, I heard ‘Last Suppa’ on the radio this morning. (*Major eye roll*)

When I started reading his stories, the blunt pick up lines, the ridicule and exploitation of insecurities I constantly thought “how could anyone be this mean and still pick up girls?” I’m sure the psychology majors and counselors who have read this book are all over it and have their theories, but only Tucker Max knows his motivation and who knows what the young woman were thinking.

Who is Tucker Max today?

Like anyone, I was curious as to how this young man’s experiences affected who he would be today. So I went to his blog: Tuckermax.com. I went through some of the stories I hadn’t read before, was thoroughly disgusted by his continuing lack of maturity, when I read this: http://www.tuckermax.com/other/retirement/. This was exactly what I was looking for. I want to be clear, as I feel Tucker would appreciate it as well, I was not looking for his regrets or an apology to all the people he used and and abused along the way. I was looking for the real person behind all his “bullshit.” What I found was a person who had shared his “unique” way of finding his place in the world, and who now wanted to take new direction with his writing. This post then led me to his new site TuckerMax.me. If you are at all disgusted, horrified, outraged, hating, or traumatized by Tucker Max’s writing (and yes, you need to have read something of his in order to have a valid opinion) you need to read The Tucker Max Retirement post. I believe that this will give you a glimpse at some of his true thoughts and not just the drunken stories of his 20’s.

Also, Tucker is a pretty amazing marketer. I would NEVER let him do public relations. His ego gives him the feeling of immortality which becomes dangerous when cultivating positive public opinion.



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